Thursday, September 3, 2009

Yes, I am still here... just quietly contemplating my navel

It has been ages, I know. Well, sometimes we just get seriously sidetracked and lately i have had so many priorities that I just haven't kept up with the blog. In some sort of defense though, I have been journaling. It has been an ongoing project of mine to get back to mySELF. ...A continuance of a spiritual journey that I began many years ago. So, I started a journal about the same time I stopped blogging. Private stuff you know. Time has been precious, and so the blogging end of things seemed to be less important. I do want you to know that I have been making progress with my finding mySELF. I was actually right here, under my own nose. Just a little forgotten and very confused. Wouldn't anyone be if you forgot where you put yourSELF? I was hidden behind everyone else in my life, getting tarnished and dusty, and it felt like my own needs didn't matter a bit. A life of service is fine for Mother Theresa types, but I do have my limits. So, I have been asking questions like:
  • What do I want to be when I grow up?
  • What do I love to do and couldn't do without?
  • What do I want in my life?
...well, you get the idea. I know for sure that I love being creative, and it makes my SELF feel really great when I am creating something. I will be sharing some of my process in the following blogs, but this is how I started out:

I am on course to figure out just who I am these days. …Maybe where I got lost along the way,and which way I want to go. I feel usurped. Everyone else came in and bumped me out. I am just hanging on by my itty bitty fingernails to my own shoulders.…And it doesn’t feel good.

The process started with listing 6 things that I love. And Guess what? They changed after a few days!

1 comment:

  1. I love your new blog entry and the questions per se. They leave so much room for interpretation and the answers seem to change so often, just like you said. Maybe it is an aging or maturing process, or even a healing process.
    Quiet people seem to get bumped out often and then they retreat. It is hard to hold one's own. One doesn't even want to.
    For me, from the beginning (when seeing your site on Ravelry) your creative energy was and is so apparent, you may probably not even aware of how long-lasting that impression is on many of your readers. Sometimes one is innately stronger than one thinks. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.